Parenting

Parenting

Here members will find an ever expanding collection of resources and information.

Insightful Parenting NEW!  Just added April 26, 2018. This section presents ideas and information that may inspire you or help you to guide your child with greater insight.

Science News offers highlights of findings from interesting newly published research, notices about news or events, and other information of interest.

Book Reviews offers reviews of recently published books related to human development, parenting and other topics of interest to parents.

Suggested Books presents an annotated list of recommended books related in some way to the content of this website. It is updated when we become aware of something that may be of interest to you.

Recommended Sites and Businesses provides links to helpful websites and information about other resources you may find supportive or useful for you or your child.

Parenting Styles discusses some of the approaches to child rearing that are currently popular, helping you make informed decisions about your own parenting options.

Most of the content in this section is available only to members.  Please log in or join Insights For Parents to have full access to this content.

 

An Archive Of Some of Our Most Popular “Instant Insights”

Why do you think more clearly after meditating?

Before meditation, your mind may be chaotic. During meditation, your mind calms down and the chatter quiets, at least somewhat.  After meditation, when you return to your thinking mind, your thoughts are less anxious.  You can often consider things from a different perspective or in a more calm open way. To ease into this calmer way of thinking any time during the day just stop what your doing and pay attend to your breath for a minute or so.   (9/28/17)

Want your child to listen to you?

If you have something important to say, good or bad, help your child focus on you and create interactional synchrony between the two of you. If your child is small, stoop, squat or crouch down so you’re at eye level.  Stand or sit near your older child and look into your child’s face.  Catch your child’s eyes.  No matter what the message, try to think for a quick second why you love this child.  The warmth that  you beam out will help communicates trust and connection.  When you do this, even tough messages will be heard better. And good messages will be really taken in.  (10/31/17)

Want more happiness? Less stress? Kids who are more joyfull?

Attending to what is “within” is only one part of thriving and living happily. Practices such as mindfulness, journaling, meditation and yoga can each bring measurable changes in our neurocircuitry and physiology that promote wellness and happiness, but there’s something else we need to do: Get together with friends and interact. We need to do this in real life, not through FaceBook, On-Line Games, Chat, or Instagram. We evolved as a species against great odds because we are very skillful at cooperating, connecting, and sharing ideas. This same capacity can bring increased levels of oxytocin, a neuropeptide associated with the calm-and-connect response, which is basically the opposite of our better known fight-or-flight response. (Oxytocin doesn’t get triggered by social media!)   Socializing is a basic human need and a source of enormous comfort and pleasure.  (10/15/17)

Why it’s important to take care of YOU:

  1. You deserve it
    2. Emotions spread from person to person. If you are stressed, overwhelmed, exhausted …. the feelings transfer to your children and other members of your family. (They also transfer to friends and co-workers). (11/17/17)

It’s astounding that you exist.

Ever wonder what the probability is of YOU being here? It’s something like 1 in 10 2,685,000 Which is pretty close to zero. Or maybe something like 1 in 400 trillion. It’s calculated by estimating the probability of your mother and father meeting in the first place, then their getting together, then the probability of the right sperm meeting the right egg (1 in 400 quadrillion),…. And the same is true of course for your child. One in 400 trillion that you would have THIS child. Existing is like winning the ultimate the jack-pot. Treasure both you and your child. (12/4/17)

A “meaningful” life probably feels better than a “happy” life

Since the late 1990s psychologists and neuroscientists have studied “happiness,” trying to discern why some people are happier than others and the kinds of personal qualities and behaviors that seem to promote a sense of happiness. Happiness implies an easy life, little stress and many good things coming your way. But recent research is revealing that this notion of “happiness” does not bring contentment or even joy, largely because it feels unearned. Instead, living a meaningful life seems to bring a greater sense of life satisfaction and well-being. It’s a better kind of happiness.

A meaningful life is one in which you use your gifts, reach your potential, continually develop and grow. It often means doing something you feel is worthwhile, contributing to a community or giving to others. It is a life lived with purpose.

This has some real implications for how we guide our children. Rather than trying to create an easy life, you may want to help your child cultivate a meaningful life by:  noticing your child’s gifts and helping your child find opportunities to develop them  letting your child experience the value of earning things ♥ building skills of perseverance, resilience and commitment (by not trying to “fix” everything)  helping your child find meaning and purpose, and to devote some time to causes he or she believes in. (2/12/18)